8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
