the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
sarcasm needs its own font
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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