So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Randomize
