that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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