It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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