You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
