Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
