FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
