I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I think I have vodka in my lungs
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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