I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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