I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
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