My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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