I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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