Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson

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(641): View more from Iowa

I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.

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(480): View more from Arizona

Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.

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(561): View more from Florida

His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.

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(619): View more from California

It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.

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(949): View more from California

Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.

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(727): View more from Florida

But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.

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