On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Randomize
