It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
