There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize