Just fell off a train. Bad.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
You took a bar mat shot.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize