Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
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