So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize