so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
