it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
