Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
