that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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