there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
