I got chris browned last night
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
