and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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