bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
