erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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