hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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