You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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