why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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