Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
‪So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?‬
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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