I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize