ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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