Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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