I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
do herpes really smell.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Randomize
