that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
