great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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