I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
