In America we eat man semen.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
