Three words: puerto rican gang bang
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
should my penis look like a turkey
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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