Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
