i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
