problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
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