Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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