do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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