I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
