you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize
