I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
i will never coherently bang her
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I am available for nakedness
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
