take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
The air taste purple.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
