you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize